Dreams and fantasies...i wonder if there is another subject to talk about,which makes a dreamer happier.When high i revel in the joy of accomplishment of a dream and when low i keep believing that someday somebody up there will breathe life to my dream(s)... whatsoever..dreams had and have always been kinda indispensable part of me.More precisely ,i live in a world of dreams and illusions.
Plunging back in time,i see myself as an enthusiastic kid with 'big','heroic' dreams(quite like the typical heroic dreams of kids)..I dreamt of becoming an IPS officer so that i could punish all the wrong doers.Not just that,i had total faith in my 'one woman army'.I dreamt of putting an end to all the evil that was prevalent and make the world the way it ought to be..the way i had seen it in my imagination from what i read in stories and what my parents and elders taught me.(funny?)
There was another facet of my dreams..Still funnier.I had improvised a 'fairy friend' of my dreams whom i used to call 'udne wali gudiya'
And this 'udne wali gudiya' supposedly was a messiah for the whole of family.How can i forget the way i used to counsel papa and ma on their everyday hitches saying,'udne wali gudiya kehti hai ki....'
As a kid,i also dreamt of becoming a 'big girl' soon.I dreamt of going to college.In my thoughts college life was such a fun.
I grew up a little.The two digit figure of the years i had lived now entered the prized teenage.It was the time when Papa's inspiring words served as catalyst to my dreams.I got a little too much into studies under the belief that 'udne wali gudiya' could help no more and that studying hard was the only way to make my dreams come true.My dreams constricted to scoring well at school and making my parents proud with my performance...I dreamt of becoming like papa.The dream of becoming an IPS gave way to the dream of becoming an engineer like papa.
But all this while the making-the-world-right pursuit did not cease.In my own little circle at home and in school i kept imposing on people the so called 'right values' ....yes, on almost everybody without fail.Cant say why or how but i also developed a feminist attitude. I hated to hear when people talked low about females.And in the fuss,i would act like guys and do everything the way guys do.I would even not believe that girls have lesser physical strength than guys!!
Finally i grew up.Part of my dreams came true.I am a big girl now.Yes,i am (for even my dreams tell the same).I go to college.I have some good time with friends out there.I am also an engineer-in-making!...But what is this??I didn't even realize as to when did it really happen,but my dreams have undergone a colossal change.
Over the years the almighty blessed me with little wisdom.I learnt certain realities of life.That the world has got to be the way it ..a grotesque version of what we read in books or what sermons tell us.That its silly to aim to make the world flawless(we don't deserve that being flawed ourselves).All we humans should aspire,is to make it better.Now i know that i need not be or behave like guys to prove females or to prove myself.In other words,i learnt to value femininity.
Now,my dreams are more 'realistic' ranging from ,keeping my parents happy in their old age,making every effort on my side to keep my family happy,being sincere and efficient in my work place,to be loved by the person i love,(this one's both funny and incredible)to be a mom someday when i grow older,to start an NGO for the needy,to serve my country in my little way...so on and so forth..
Then there is a list of whimsical fantasies like writing a book, learning to play a musical instrument,getting back to my childhood love i.e painting,spending some quiet time by the sea...........huh!...another endless list
I do feel i have been a little too demanding with myself,my life and my people..but cool it guys!thats just matter of dreams.And then,you never know,He might be busy working on some of your dreams...above all my dreams help me to live some precious moments(who cares if its just an illusion.it may be a reality someday)
Guess thats enough...let me stop here and go back to dream..Till then,here's wishing you happy dreaming!!
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Love,as i see it...
Love.....its like the wind.I cant see it but i can feel it.And shall i tell u a deep seated truth?For some time now,i have come to value love(i mean 'true love'..if at all it exists and deep down i believe,it does.)so much so that i always end up chasing such thoughts..thoughts of love.Because,the more i think of it,the more i fear of falling in love!(is it rightly said that fear never disappoints??!!)Talks apart.Today i am in to pour out all i have been able to explore about LOVE.
Well,i think love has a very diverse implication in our lives.This certainly is for the good,because,no matter whatsoever form love may camouflage beneath,the magic that those four letters come together to create,makes life beautiful,complete and above all worth living.
I consider love analogous to a tree.They share so much in common.Though absolutely mundane,there is no substitute to the shelter both of a tree and of love.(then be it a long tiresome walk on a hot sunny day or be it walking through the road of life).Both never cease to grow with time.Both outlive us.And most importantly,its hard to imagine life without both of them.
There are basically two forms of love.One form of love is the 'inbuilt love'.Like parents' love for their children and vice versa,siblings' love for each other and the love of the almighty.Needless to say,the tree of true love is planted within our souls right before the time we are born.Had it not been so,how would a new born baby be able to recognize her mom,much before the gray cells of her brain come into action.It often used to leave me wondering,as to what was the thing that brought back the giggle on the face of a crying baby the moment she is back in her mom's or dad's arms.Ever realized that the first word that you involuntarily utter in pain,is 'maa'.The only thing that can explain all such phenomena
is love...and only love.This is what i call inbuilt love.Its simply there and we cannot or need not explain as to why?But it sure does wonders.Love for instinctive inclinations,or for inanimate things is also inbuilt.like some love music,some love to travel,some love books,some love money!Its also inexplicable.At times its concerned with heredity but quite often its absolutely instinctive.
Then there is this another form of love,which i will say is not a fully grown tree of love when we are born.Its just a sapling initially and its up to us to nurture it so that soon it takes the shape of a tree(the way god did with inbuilt love much before he sent us down.And by not doing so,i fear,in a way we are disobeying gods will)Like the love for our fellow beings(better known as compassion)and the love that we fall for.That is,the love for that 'special companion' .
For the former all i will say is,its all right if we do not care to love our fellow beings,if we can well fortify ourselves for the day when we will have to confront the almighty.
Love that we fall for...Actually its this form of love that i have been trying to understand lately.What is love all about?when do you know you are in love?..so on and so forth...Realization..Yes...its the word that pops up in my mind when i think of love.The realization of significance of another person in your life who is unconditionally dear to you.The realization of belongingness to someone to whom you do not actually belong!!The realization of the unbound faith that you have for someone.the realization that you immensely respect someone.The realization of finding a companion for whom there never was and there never will be a substitute and whose company you do not find surfeit even for a lifetime.
When you can feel the presence of someone always by your side in low moments and you miss him while having a ball, i guess its love.What more.Erich Segal says it best when he says,'to love is never having to say you are sorry'.For true love does not seeks regrets and apologies.Rather its always ready to forgive because it can see things deep down that the rest of world cannot and things unsaid.
Like life,lov is a process and not a pursuit.Its a journey not a destination.Therefore,its path may be bumpy at times but thats not reason enough to put an end to love(could we do the same with life??)After all how can we unrealize something that we have already realized?True love is never complete.It keeps growing with time.(no wonder, expressions like 'we are no more in love','we broke up' etc often leaves me intrigued.)
Some say love is a commitment.I beg to differ.We love somebody and make efforts to see the person happy not because its a commitment but because we love to do it.I believe,true love never flourishes under the grace of confinement.Rightly said,
"if you love something,set it free;
if it comes back to you,its yours;
if it does not it never was."
All forms of love are interdependent.If we have abundance of any one form of love(which we all do have),it should make us rich in every form of love.
In simple words,love is great beyond words.And its great to fall for love and to be in love!!
Wish you loads and loads of love in your life!
Well,i think love has a very diverse implication in our lives.This certainly is for the good,because,no matter whatsoever form love may camouflage beneath,the magic that those four letters come together to create,makes life beautiful,complete and above all worth living.
I consider love analogous to a tree.They share so much in common.Though absolutely mundane,there is no substitute to the shelter both of a tree and of love.(then be it a long tiresome walk on a hot sunny day or be it walking through the road of life).Both never cease to grow with time.Both outlive us.And most importantly,its hard to imagine life without both of them.
There are basically two forms of love.One form of love is the 'inbuilt love'.Like parents' love for their children and vice versa,siblings' love for each other and the love of the almighty.Needless to say,the tree of true love is planted within our souls right before the time we are born.Had it not been so,how would a new born baby be able to recognize her mom,much before the gray cells of her brain come into action.It often used to leave me wondering,as to what was the thing that brought back the giggle on the face of a crying baby the moment she is back in her mom's or dad's arms.Ever realized that the first word that you involuntarily utter in pain,is 'maa'.The only thing that can explain all such phenomena
is love...and only love.This is what i call inbuilt love.Its simply there and we cannot or need not explain as to why?But it sure does wonders.Love for instinctive inclinations,or for inanimate things is also inbuilt.like some love music,some love to travel,some love books,some love money!Its also inexplicable.At times its concerned with heredity but quite often its absolutely instinctive.
Then there is this another form of love,which i will say is not a fully grown tree of love when we are born.Its just a sapling initially and its up to us to nurture it so that soon it takes the shape of a tree(the way god did with inbuilt love much before he sent us down.And by not doing so,i fear,in a way we are disobeying gods will)Like the love for our fellow beings(better known as compassion)and the love that we fall for.That is,the love for that 'special companion' .
For the former all i will say is,its all right if we do not care to love our fellow beings,if we can well fortify ourselves for the day when we will have to confront the almighty.
Love that we fall for...Actually its this form of love that i have been trying to understand lately.What is love all about?when do you know you are in love?..so on and so forth...Realization..Yes...its the word that pops up in my mind when i think of love.The realization of significance of another person in your life who is unconditionally dear to you.The realization of belongingness to someone to whom you do not actually belong!!The realization of the unbound faith that you have for someone.the realization that you immensely respect someone.The realization of finding a companion for whom there never was and there never will be a substitute and whose company you do not find surfeit even for a lifetime.
When you can feel the presence of someone always by your side in low moments and you miss him while having a ball, i guess its love.What more.Erich Segal says it best when he says,'to love is never having to say you are sorry'.For true love does not seeks regrets and apologies.Rather its always ready to forgive because it can see things deep down that the rest of world cannot and things unsaid.
Like life,lov is a process and not a pursuit.Its a journey not a destination.Therefore,its path may be bumpy at times but thats not reason enough to put an end to love(could we do the same with life??)After all how can we unrealize something that we have already realized?True love is never complete.It keeps growing with time.(no wonder, expressions like 'we are no more in love','we broke up' etc often leaves me intrigued.)
Some say love is a commitment.I beg to differ.We love somebody and make efforts to see the person happy not because its a commitment but because we love to do it.I believe,true love never flourishes under the grace of confinement.Rightly said,
"if you love something,set it free;
if it comes back to you,its yours;
if it does not it never was."
All forms of love are interdependent.If we have abundance of any one form of love(which we all do have),it should make us rich in every form of love.
In simple words,love is great beyond words.And its great to fall for love and to be in love!!
Wish you loads and loads of love in your life!
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